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Getting Smart With Sexual Fitness Apps

Posted: May 19 2015

Apple users seem very devoted to their brand, and this has been made very apparent by the integration of the Apple Watch into its user’s bedroom antics. Hey, why not? Sex is, after all, an aerobic activity! It burns calories, gets the blood flowing, and releases endorphins. If you’re counting calories, I say that burning calories while having sex counts. Sexual fitness is the wave of the future, people.

It’s really not all that surprising that the Apple Watch would be used in such a way. Sure, it might take out some of the romance but I also think hard work should be rewarded. If fitness is important to you, then sexual fitness should be as well. The real question is where will this all lead?

I would say that a lot of companies, especially mega companies like Apple, aren’t going to pimp their products out for this kind of use. The app market, however, is a totally different beast. It’s average, everyday people who come up with and sell apps, after all, and I think one day we may see a whole market of apps designed to help track your sexual fitness. I bet it would be wildly successful too.

Currently, there is nothing in the app developer guidelines that would prohibit a sexual wellness or sexual fitness app from being developed. Of course, it would have to be tasteful. There couldn’t be blatant sexual images or porn (that’s what the internet is for anyway), but it seems like the market is ripe for sexual fitness apps.

Getting Smart With Sexual Fitness Apps

Amazon has already tapped into this market with a section in its online store devoted entirely to sexual wellness. You can get everything from a vibrator to lube to condoms. I would think that Apple since it’s a company that likes to be on the cutting edge of technology, would see Amazon’s success and nurture the creation of sexual fitness apps.

I’m a runner and I have a running app that simulates zombies chasing you in a post-apocalyptic world. I know it sounds kind of silly, but it’s nice to get your mind off of the fact that you still have 7 miles to go in your long run for the day. Can you imagine that technology transferred to the bedroom? Instead of “My Fitness Pal” you could have “My Sex Pal”. In lieu of “Epicurious” you’d get “Bicurious”. The possibilities are endless, people. Endless.

Of course, you can already find sex-related apps in the App Store for other devices. Seriously, go search “sex” and you’ll find everything from sexual position guides to sex tip apps. It’s fairly obvious that Apple has no problem with people using their devices for things like this (and why would they?). I’m willing to bet it just a matter of time before the Apple Watch and other fitness device companies break into the sexual health marketplace. I honestly can’t think of any reason why not. It’s the 21st century after all, and people have sex. Lots and lots of sex.

In the meantime just remember: it’s ok to love your Apple Watch, it’s just not ok to love your Apple Watch. But then again, whatever floats your boats! As long as you’re being safe, a healthy sexual appetite is a wonderful thing.

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