The Ultimate Guide to Unusual Sex Products
Posted: May 11 2015
You know the old adage “Different strokes for different folks”? Well, in no place is this more apparent than in the world of sex products. Basically, if you can imagine it you’re almost certainly able to find it. The internet has made this even more apparent, because all it takes is one google search for you to find that video of a woman squatting on coffee table in a grass skirt that will really turn you on. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, as long as acts are consensual I say that the sky is the limit! I just think it may surprise you to see some of the sex products that are out on the market today. So without further ado – sex products you never knew existed (but may always secretly wished they did)!
Remember that cute little teddy bear you couldn’t sleep without when you were 3? Well, there’s a version of that teddy for you now that you’re all grown up and he has an added bonus: he vibrates. He even has a little nubby nose to stimulate the clitoris and tongue that will penetrate the vagina.
That’s all I have to say about that. If baths and rubber duckies were more your thing, you can get yourself a vibrating rubber ducky! It’s a vibrator and a fun bath toy rolled into one!
For the more serious sex product connoisseurs out there, there’s the “Autoblow 2”. This machine simulates the feeling of a blowjob. It’s a pretty complicated looking machine and I find it a bit intimidating as well, but I guess they have to test this stuff to make sure it’s not going to go haywire and rip your penis off, so enjoy! The ladies have not been forgotten in the simulated oral sex category! You can purchase a rotating tongue that I’m also guessing by its looks could double as a fan in the summertime. I’m all about multi-tasking sex products. I’m still waiting to find one that can help claim taxes and give me an orgasm.
Modern technology allows us to do a lot of pretty amazing stuff. Face transplants, supersonic jets, the International Space Station and now – long distance, internet controlled sex products. Oh yes! For the long distance couple there’s a pair of sex toys that interact with each other via the internet, so you can be together without actually being together. The safest sex you can have!
Are you into tentacle porn? Who isn’t, right? Well, there’s a sex product for that! You can buy a tentacle shaped dildo, or even products that look like the genitals of dragons. I’ve never wondered about dragon genitals personally, but now I’m totally going to be thinking about it.
For all, you foot fetish folks there is a silicone foot that has, in place of a heel, a vagina. So you can literally have sex with a foot. I’m not altogether sure this is how foot fetishes work, but no judgement here!
Some sex product inventions are quite useful. Take the sex toy glove. This glove allows you to attach vibrators to it that you can control with buttons on the glove itself. I will never look at Michael Jackson’s sequined glove the same again.
Land ho! For all you nautical naughties out there who have thought “I really wish someone would make a vibrating periscope for the vagina”, your search is over. There is a periscope that can be inserted into the vagina that lets you take a look at what going on down below deck as well as provides some motion in the ocean. Arrggghhhh…walk the plank, matey.
It’s nice to know that the world of sex products is as varied as the people it caters too. Diversity is such a wonderful thing, let’s all embrace it! Go google something and see what you can come up with today!